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A grocery store manifesto

Community transmission of COVID-19 is happening in Canada: The virus is affecting people without a recent travel history or known exposure to an infected traveller. Now that community transmission is occurring, it’s impossible to know or track everyone who is potentially infected because it can take up to 14 days for symptoms to appear. Staying…

Community transmission of COVID-19 is happening in Canada: The virus is affecting people without a recent travel history or known exposure to an infected traveller.

Now that community transmission is occurring, it’s impossible to know or track everyone who is potentially infected because it can take up to 14 days for symptoms to appear.

Staying at home and not going anywhere unless absolutely necessary is the right thing to do, especially now. Socially distancing from one another will prevent COVID-19 from spreading exponentially.

Even though we’re avoiding gyms, libraries, restaurants, bakeries, shops and gatherings, we still need to get groceries. The challenge now is that people who are at risk – and people who are contagious –  are also grocery shopping and touching communal surfaces.

I went grocery shopping yesterday and made several observations (and mistakes) that increase the risk for spreading COVID-19.

 

Grocery carts are viral vectors.  

People can be contagious with COVID-19 before showing any symptoms, spreading virus onto objects they touch. People with sick contacts at home are also potential sources of virus.

Do they wash their hands before leaving home or upon arriving in a grocery store? Probably not.

Un-sanitized objects in public, especially door handles, tables and grocery carts should be considered contaminated unless we have seen them sanitized ourselves.

Without proper disinfection of communal surfaces and objects between each and every use, we need to assume that things like doorknobs and grocery carts are potentially contaminated with virus. We do not know who touched them before us.

  • Wash your hands immediately before leaving your house to reduce the risk of spreading the virus to others while you are outside your home.
  • Bring disinfecting wipes that are effective against viruses and carefully wipe down the grocery cart with them before using it.
  • Sanitize your hands after disinfecting the grocery cart.
  • Push the grocery cart with your forearm, not your hands.
  • Open door handles with your elbow.
  • Don’t touch your face or eat food without first washing your hands.

Ask your grocery store owner about their sanitation practices if you don’t see evidence of increased cleaning efforts. If they don’t have a strategy for disinfecting grocery carts, baskets, conveyers and debit/credit card keypads, they need one. Now.

 

Shop for vulnerable people.

We know that people older than 60 years of age, or anyone with diabetes, asthma, heart disease, active cancer, history of stroke or a condition requiring dialysis are at greater risk for serious illness and complications.

If you know someone who’s at risk, pick up their groceries or medications so they can stay home.

If you’re at risk, now’s the time to ask for help.

 

Cell phones don’t belong.

We know viruses can survive on cell phones. Keep them at home or in your car while you’re shopping.

If you must bring your cell phone with you, clean it with an antiviral disinfectant when you get home, then wash your hands.

 

Keep children away.

Evidence to date shows that children are not at a higher risk for COVID-19 than adults. The trouble is, grocery carts can and will be contaminated with virus, unless thoroughly disinfected between use.

Most children will not get very sick with COVID-19, but they will help spread the virus if they are sitting in un-sanitized grocery carts and touching contaminated surfaces.

  • Keep your children at home.
  • If they can’t be left alone at home, ask someone to watch them for you why they play outside.
  • If you are a single parent with small children, go shopping when they are asleep and ask a trusted family member, friend or neighbour to stand in your front hall while you are gone.
  • If they must come with you, avoid placing children in grocery carts if you can and wash their hands with soap and water upon returning home
  • Wear infants/small toddlers in carriers

 

Keep a distance.

Since we don’t know who is infected and who is not, we need to keep our distance from each other in public places at all times. A safe distance is at least 2 metres (i.e. the length of two baseball bats or two guitars lined up).

People cough and sneeze into the air, not in their arms. We need to remain far enough away to avoid getting infected when this happens.

 

Grocery store workers are front-line workers.

They are providing an essential service during this health crisis.

They are vulnerable, potentially exposing themselves to infected people for hours a day.

Many of them have no choice but to work within a few feet of other people. We need to protect them for everyone’s wellbeing.

Like front-line health care providers, grocery store workers should wear masks when they cannot keep a safe distance from people who are potentially infected.

And, they need to frequently and properly wash their hands with soap and water or use hand sanitizer. If that’s not possible, they may use disposable gloves and change them frequently.

Pack your own groceries.

 

Reusable bags help spread virus.

Reusable tote bags are known to be sources of infection.

Place them on the floor, not the counter when you get home.

Wash them between use.

 

Most importantly, wash your hands.

When you arrive home, wash your hands thoroughly for at least 20 seconds with soap and water.

Put your groceries away – and wash your hands again.

 

The majority of people who get sick will recover without intervention, but it can cause serious illness. People who are older, and people with underlying medical problems like heart disease, asthma, COPD or diabetes, are more likely to develop serious illness, or death is severe cases.

Let’s do our part to protect people at risk.

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Nurturing calm

Today’s post is brought to you by the never-ending interruptions of my children whenever I sit down to write these days. Thankfully, I’ve learned how to remain calm when I start to feel like I’m losing my mind.  I’ve recently discovered the power of square breathing (also known as tactical or box breathing). I practice it when…

Today’s post is brought to you by the never-ending interruptions of my children whenever I sit down to write these days. Thankfully, I’ve learned how to remain calm when I start to feel like I’m losing my mind. 

I’ve recently discovered the power of square breathing (also known as tactical or box breathing). I practice it when I find myself becoming impatient or feeling tense, or when I’m simply feeling overwhelmed by the demands of work and parenthood.

Square breathing looks like this:

  1. Breathe in deeply through your nose for a count of four.
  2. Keep that breath in for a count of four.
  3. Gradually exhale through your mouth for a count of four.
  4. Pause breathing for a count of four.

Repeat for 3-5 breaths, whenever needed.

Taking a moment when we’re feeling stressed or worried to focus on our breathing can help us become re-centred, focused and calm.

Sometimes resting between breaths can make all the difference between a quiet mind and racing thoughts.

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What’s okay & what’s not okay

Lately I’ve been struggling to be clear with people about what’s okay and what’s not okay. If I’m being totally honest, boundaries always been a struggle for me. In fact, most of my biggest regrets in life and at work have happened when I’ve failed to establish boundaries. Maintaining boundaries and keeping ourselves and other…

Lately I’ve been struggling to be clear with people about what’s okay and what’s not okay. If I’m being totally honest, boundaries always been a struggle for me. In fact, most of my biggest regrets in life and at work have happened when I’ve failed to establish boundaries.

Maintaining boundaries and keeping ourselves and other people accountable is hard work. Especially when we’re concerned about wanting to be liked by others and when we’re worried about hurting people’s feelings (as a long-standing people-pleaser, I know this feeling well!).

But – as hard as it can be to uphold accountability, being clear about what’s okay and what’s not okay is required for us to be the most compassionate with ourselves and also the people we work with and care for.

Nursing is defined by the limits we set about what we will and won’t do, and what we will and won’t accept. The sensitive, intimate and powerful nature of our work demands this.

We know from unfortunate situations in the media that failing to set boundaries is toxic to clients, families, colleagues, health care institutions, organizations and professions.

When we don’t set boundaries and hold our colleagues and ourselves accountable for our actions, and when we don’t follow through with consequences of crossing boundaries, people can feel hurt, mistreated and disrespected.

Setting boundaries boils down to having the courage to potentially upset other people while simultaneously believing that our self-worth does not hang on other people’s reactions to the decisions we make about what’s okay and what’s not okay.

So what can we do?

Separate people from their behaviours. The key to maintaining boundaries and holding people accountable is to separate people from their behaviours by addressing what they’re doing or how they’re acting, instead of attacking who they are as a person.

Reach out. Whenever I’m struggling with a boundary and unsure what to say or do (or when I know what I should do but I’m afraid of doing it), I try to talk to my good friend Kelsey. She’s got firm roots – she’s clear about her values, she’s empathetic and know’s right from wrong. Just a few weeks ago we role-played an awkward conversation I was afraid of having with someone that was all about boundaries. Chatting with her ahead of time lessened my fears, gave me the confidence to speak up and reminded me that I wasn’t an uncaring, flawed person for holding someone accountable for their actions.

Practice makes progress. Feeling comfortable with saying “no”, “that’s not okay”, “I can’t do this” gets easier with practice.

Worst-case scenario. When I’m on the fence about setting a boundary or calling someone out for crossing one, I think to myself: What’s the worst thing that might happen if I say no? When I actually think about my fears, the thing I’m most afraid of isn’t going to be the end of my life, my career or my relationship with the other person.

Recite a motto. I need written (and sometimes daily) reminders to keep me on the right path. I’ve got two sticky notes on my desk. One says “Discomfort beats resentment and regret”. The other one asks, “Will this behaviour get me where I need to go?”. These sayings remind me that holding people and myself accountable is important. And, that temporary discomfort is an easier pill to swallow than resentment and regret.

Setting boundaries is not only healthy, it’s essential for us to do our work.

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The happiness of pursuit

Chasing happiness was my modus operandi for many years. I had big dreams and high expectations, and believed that happiness was something to be found in the end, after all the hard work. Happiness wasn’t part of the journey. I’ll be happy when I get accepted into school. I’ll be happy when this project is…

Chasing happiness was my modus operandi for many years. I had big dreams and high expectations, and believed that happiness was something to be found in the end, after all the hard work. Happiness wasn’t part of the journey.

I’ll be happy when I get accepted into school.

I’ll be happy when this project is done. 

I’ll be happy when I’m done school. 

I’ll be happy when I’m married.

I’ll be happy when I have kids.

I’ll be happy when I’m an NP.  

I’ll be happy when I’m making better money. 

I’ll be happy when the new boss starts. 

I’ll be happy when I get more vacation time. 

I’ll be happy when I’m doing anything other than what I’m doing now….

Sound familiar?

Flash forward to now and I’ve learned that the reason I chased happiness was that I wasn’t filled from gratitude.

Many of us think that happiness is on the other side of the extraordinary, life-changing moments. We believe we’ll be happy when we’ve achieved something we’ve longed or worked hard for. But we’re not.

If you think about some of the most remarkable moments in your life, do you remember feeling sort of let down afterwards? Or think to yourself – that was it?

We all feel that way if we’re not practicing gratitude.

When we’re not grateful for the small moments, we hustle for the amazing, life-changing moments and end up disappointed.

Happiness lies in quiet moments. It’s right there in front of us, but it’s easy to miss in the daily grind and when life gets hard.

If I can give one piece of advice it would be to start a daily practice of gratitude.

There’s plenty of research showing that consciously thinking or writing about what we’re grateful for is how we feel happy right here, right now.

It’s that simple.

Happiness is there on the hardest, most challenging days and in the frustrating moments, if we’re paying attention to all that we have.

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Working for money

I’ve learned that working primarily for the sake of money is a sure-fire way to feel burnt out and unhappy. Money is a necessary part of life, and it’s a powerful incentive to work, but chasing money is risky. I’m not suggesting we should work for free or get paid less than we’re worth. I…

I’ve learned that working primarily for the sake of money is a sure-fire way to feel burnt out and unhappy. Money is a necessary part of life, and it’s a powerful incentive to work, but chasing money is risky.

I’m not suggesting we should work for free or get paid less than we’re worth. I do think it’s important for us to do work that we care about, work that the world needs and work that pays us.

I can tell you that any time, in fact every time, I’ve prioritized a pay check over my happiness, wellbeing and interests, I’ve ended up worn out, miserable and in regret.

To work solely for money is to believe that money will buy us happiness, that our values and interests don’t matter, that we’ve got nothing else to work for. Just because the ‘money is good’, doesn’t cut it.

In his 2017 commencement speech at the University of Glasgow, Apple CEO Tim Cook had this to say to graduates eager to pursue a pay check:

“My advice to all of you is, don’t work for money — you will wear out fast, or you’ll never make enough and you will never be happy, one or the other. You have to find the intersection of doing something you’re passionate about and at the same time something that is in the service of other people. If you don’t find that intersection, you’re not going to be very happy in life.”

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